(English)
Why is there such a apprehension with feeling vulnerable these days?
I have been thinking about this and it seems to me that our society does not allow us to feel sad, sick or just weak. This week I 've been a little bit under the weather. I had fever and body ache. My response was to try to ignore it but that didn't work because 'Thursday I woke up with such a headache. I did what most of us do, I took a pill, advil hoping it would go away within minutes but my body resisted it. I had chills a fever that afternoon. I hesitated to ask for help but I did. I asked one of my coworkers to cover the last class for me. But I left feeling like such a baby, bad for delegating my job to someone else. After giving it some thought I realize there is something wrong with this picture. I try to be responsible, I hardly ever miss a day of work, just like the rest of my coworkers I expect a lot from myself...but sometimes God a the universe remind me that is not all up to me. It is not all in the agenda. I feel blue when I am sick. I have no tolerance for feeling sick or in pain. I admire people going through major illness and painful treatments , some of them are so close to mu heart right now. I pray for them. It is my major fear to ever go through something like that. I pray for health for myself and my love ones every day. But today I allow myself to feel weak sometimes, and to feel like I need my mom and dad to take care of me when I am not well. I recognize there's a part of me that will always feel that way and it is Ok. I accept it. I am not immature or trying to take advantage of anyone. It is just who I am.
I can feel like a broken shell sometimes, I give myself permission for that,
Have a week full of health and light!
(Espanol)
Por que sera que hay tanta aprension con la palabra vulnerabilidad ?
He estado pensando en esto y me parece que nuestra sociedad no nos permite sentirnos tristes, enfermos o debiles. Esta semana he estado un poco enferma. Tuve fiebre y dolor muscular. Mi reaccion inmediata a todo esto fue ignonarlo, pero no finciono porque el jueves me desperate con tremendo dolor de cabeza, me resisti a pedir ayuda pero al final del dia le pedi a una colega que tomara mi ultima clase para irme mas temprano a mi casa. Me fui derrotada, sientiendome como una guagua por delegar mi trabajo a alguien mas. Pero depues de pensarlo bien me di cuenta que hay algo malo con este patron. Trato de ser responsable, como el resto de mis colegas, casi nunca falto a mi trabajo. Es quizas que espero mucho de mi. .. pero aveces Dios y el Universo me dicen que no todo esta agendado y que ciertamente no puedo controlarlo todo. Reconozco tener cero toleracia para las enfermedades y el dolor. Admiro a quienes estan pasando por grandes enfermedades y tratamientos. Oro por ellos cada dia. Algunos de ellos estan tan cerca de mi corazon ahora mismo. Le pido a Dios todo los dias porque los mios y yo misma tengamos buena salud siempre.
Por eso hoy me doy licencia para sentirme debil y auscentame una horas de mi trabajo para descansar y recuperarme, no es mi intencion abusar ni mucho menos. Cada vez que me enfermo extrano los cuidados de mis papas y esta bien , se que siempre sera asi. Es quien soy y esta bien sentIrse como una conchita de mar rota, me doy permiso para sentirme asi.
Que tengan una semana llena de salud y luz!
Why is there such a apprehension with feeling vulnerable these days?
I have been thinking about this and it seems to me that our society does not allow us to feel sad, sick or just weak. This week I 've been a little bit under the weather. I had fever and body ache. My response was to try to ignore it but that didn't work because 'Thursday I woke up with such a headache. I did what most of us do, I took a pill, advil hoping it would go away within minutes but my body resisted it. I had chills a fever that afternoon. I hesitated to ask for help but I did. I asked one of my coworkers to cover the last class for me. But I left feeling like such a baby, bad for delegating my job to someone else. After giving it some thought I realize there is something wrong with this picture. I try to be responsible, I hardly ever miss a day of work, just like the rest of my coworkers I expect a lot from myself...but sometimes God a the universe remind me that is not all up to me. It is not all in the agenda. I feel blue when I am sick. I have no tolerance for feeling sick or in pain. I admire people going through major illness and painful treatments , some of them are so close to mu heart right now. I pray for them. It is my major fear to ever go through something like that. I pray for health for myself and my love ones every day. But today I allow myself to feel weak sometimes, and to feel like I need my mom and dad to take care of me when I am not well. I recognize there's a part of me that will always feel that way and it is Ok. I accept it. I am not immature or trying to take advantage of anyone. It is just who I am.
I can feel like a broken shell sometimes, I give myself permission for that,
Have a week full of health and light!
(Espanol)
Por que sera que hay tanta aprension con la palabra vulnerabilidad ?
He estado pensando en esto y me parece que nuestra sociedad no nos permite sentirnos tristes, enfermos o debiles. Esta semana he estado un poco enferma. Tuve fiebre y dolor muscular. Mi reaccion inmediata a todo esto fue ignonarlo, pero no finciono porque el jueves me desperate con tremendo dolor de cabeza, me resisti a pedir ayuda pero al final del dia le pedi a una colega que tomara mi ultima clase para irme mas temprano a mi casa. Me fui derrotada, sientiendome como una guagua por delegar mi trabajo a alguien mas. Pero depues de pensarlo bien me di cuenta que hay algo malo con este patron. Trato de ser responsable, como el resto de mis colegas, casi nunca falto a mi trabajo. Es quizas que espero mucho de mi. .. pero aveces Dios y el Universo me dicen que no todo esta agendado y que ciertamente no puedo controlarlo todo. Reconozco tener cero toleracia para las enfermedades y el dolor. Admiro a quienes estan pasando por grandes enfermedades y tratamientos. Oro por ellos cada dia. Algunos de ellos estan tan cerca de mi corazon ahora mismo. Le pido a Dios todo los dias porque los mios y yo misma tengamos buena salud siempre.
Por eso hoy me doy licencia para sentirme debil y auscentame una horas de mi trabajo para descansar y recuperarme, no es mi intencion abusar ni mucho menos. Cada vez que me enfermo extrano los cuidados de mis papas y esta bien , se que siempre sera asi. Es quien soy y esta bien sentIrse como una conchita de mar rota, me doy permiso para sentirme asi.
Que tengan una semana llena de salud y luz!